365 Days with God - Day 21: Bowing before God

I'm giving myself a challenge. Read the Bible each day for a whole year, following the ESV Study Guide 1-year plan. Each day, I will post whatever God has revealed to me in His Word, and how it is changing me. A friend of mine once said that nothing has changed her life as much as reading the bible each day - and I'm excited for how this will change me. Join me on an adventure into the heart of God - and day by day, we can learn more about who He is and what that means to us!

- Andy Catts

Day 21, January 10, 2014

Readings: Psalm 20, Genesis 20, 1 Chronicles 23, 1 Chronicles 24, Luke 12:49-59, Luke 13:1-9
(This post was delayed due to me having food poisoning. I did my reading, but was not well enough to form a coherent post, so...I'll spare you the rest of the details.)

What an odd time to be contemplating the depth of my reliance on God. It's some ungodly hour of the morning. I am on my knees, in front of the toilet, begging God to remove the sickness that is wracking my body from the inside out. At this moment, I am completely and utterly powerless. Laid low by something I didn't expect, didn't invite in, and can do nothing about.

Without going into any more detail about the illness and my symptoms, I can truly say that I have not been in such agony before. What it did do is bring to light a stark reality of my own powerlessness. Sure, there are many things that I have a choice about - what I eat, where I will go - but a level above that, I am powerless. I only have the ability to choose what I eat because God has provided me with food. And choices. I didn't invent the different types of food that comprises the 5 food groups. They were already here. I can no more add or subtract from their existence than I can change the color of the sky.

What do I do with my powerlessness? Like so many, I could resist. Try to convince myself that I do have control. That I do have power. Or I can surrender. I can beg on my knees. I can relinquish the illusion of control that I have, and instead allow God to direct my path. To thank Him for the choices he gives me. To acknowledge His sovereignty, and my own limitations. I will strive to think as David thought, when he wrote Psalm 20:

Now I know that the LORD saves his anointed;
he will answer him from his holy heaven
with the saving might of his right hand.
Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
They collapse and fall,
but we rise and stand upright.
Oh LORD, save the king!
May he answer us when we call. (Psalm 20:6-9)