365 Days with God - Day 15: A proud fool

I'm giving myself a challenge. Read the Bible each day for a whole year, following the ESV Study Guide 1-year plan. Each day, I will post whatever God has revealed to me in His Word, and how it is changing me. A friend of mine once said that nothing has changed her life as much as reading the bible each day - and I'm excited for how this will change me. Join me on an adventure into the heart of God - and day by day, we can learn more about who He is and what that means to us!

- Andy Catts

Day 15, January 4, 2014

Readings: Psalm 14, Genesis 15, 1 Chronicles 15:1-29, 1 Chronicles 16:1-3, Luke 9:1-50

"The fool says in his heart, 'There is no God.'
They are corrupt, they do abominable deeds,
there is none who does good." (Psalm 14:1)

Even now, these words are hard to write. Hard to accept. Hard not to make excuses, and to talk about how I'm not that bad, and I'm mostly good, and that I try real hard.

But the words are there on the page. Very clear. When I think that I'm good, I'm being proud. I'm not good. I am a selfish wreck without Jesus. The hardest part? There's a thousand, a million advice books, shows, blogs, whatevers out there, telling me that I'm good. Telling me to believe in myself. Telling our entire nation, influencing our culture, nurturing a sense of pride, accomplishment. We are great. We deserve this, that, and a million other things. 

We don't.

We are corrupt. We do abominable things. We are fools who don't believe in God. Who exchange his truth for a lie that we are self-sufficient. Yet everything we have, down to the air we breathe, is because He made it, and He sustains it. Our arrogance and pride is so thick I can taste it. And yet I struggle with it, every day. Every day I want to be in charge of my own destiny. To make my own path. To control my own outcomes. And each day, I have to tell myself that I can't. That it's not up to me.

And each day that I own this truth, each day that I submit myself to God's authority, is another day that I live free of the illusion that I have some type of power. I have none. I am at the mercy of a million things outside of my control - sickness, terrorism, natural disasters and more. And I could choose to live in fear, hiding from all these things, though never being safe. I could live in defiant ignorance, daring the world to challenge me. Or I can run to the arms of my heavenly Father, who is in control over everything.

And He loves me. He cares for me. He knows what is good, and He does what is good, unlike me.

"for God is with the generation of the righteous.
You would shame the plans of the poor,
but the LORD is his refuge." (Psalm 14:5b-6)